Category Specific RSS

Categories: Satire

Aussie conflicted by choice of dim sims or hotdog as Pelosi lands in Taiwan

With political eyes on Taiwan as Nancy Pelosi proceeded with her visit to Taipei against the wishes of China, construction worker Hugh Honey faces a similar conflict as to whether he supports the East or West. 

A connoisseur of take away joints, Honey is battling the inner struggles of where his allegiances lie, conscious that his lunch order will effectively alienate him from one of the world’s superpowers. 

“I love my fried dim sims but I also can’t imagine life without hotdogs,” said Honey. 

“Most days I spend about two hours in the morning planning my lunch but with the whole Taiwan situation unfolding, I’ve now taken three and am still no clearer as to which way I should go.

“There’s just so many people watching this unfold, I gotta be real careful not to upset the United States or China.”

In his attempts to settle the internal conflict while keeping the peace, Honey ultimately went with a lamb souvlaki, much to the delight of Greece with powerbrokers in Athens confirming their critical relevance to the modern world, still intact.

Elias Pivep

Failed stand-up comic who now gets his kicks from Simpsons business memes.

Recent Posts

Atomo Locks in US$410K Pascal Order as FebriDx Demand Accelerates in the US

Atomo Diagnostics (ASX:AT1) has secured a significant new order for its patented Pascal cassette, with…

1 week ago

June 2025 quarter CPI no roadblock to August RBA rate cut

The June 2025 quarter CPI data released today were cheered by mortgage holders and share…

2 weeks ago

Vection Secures $7.3M Defence Extension as AI Demand Strengthens

AI Gains Ground in Defence Sector As governments increase investment in defence technology, AI-powered tools…

2 weeks ago

Calix Secures $44.9m ARENA Grant to Build Green Iron Plant with ZESTY Technology

Calix Limited (ASX:CXL) has taken a significant leap forward in developing Australia’s low-emissions steel value…

3 weeks ago

Harris Technology boosts retail margins in FY25 through growth of refurbished tech

Online tech retailer Harris Technology (ASX: HT8) has delivered a strong lift in gross product…

3 weeks ago

Lumos Diagnostics Secures US$317M Deal to Distribute FebriDx® in U.S.

In a significant move set to reshape rapid diagnostics in the U.S., ASX-listed Lumos Diagnostics…

4 weeks ago