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Father of four pleads with boss to return to office

For many Australian parents, pandemic-enforced lockdowns in Melbourne and Sydney have been a blessing in disguise by giving them more special time at home with their families. Hugh Honey is not one of those parents.

Working from home in his three bedroom townhouse with twin daughters aged 15 and twin sons aged 12 that are all remote learning from home, it has not been a pleasant lockdown for Honey. Prior to the pandemic, he was renowned as one of the biggest overtime workers in his company’s history.

Making things even tougher for Honey, his wife has been sharing the home office with him while attempting to meet her daily quota as a telemarketer.

“Please Sir, just get me an exemption to come into the office. You don’t even have to pay me,” said Honey in an email to his boss.

“You can take it out of my annual leave.”

While Honey has been lobbying management to secure him a lockdown exemption as an essential worker, they have not been as forthcoming as he would have liked, insisting they cannot justify his role as the International Travel Manager as essential.

“Hugh, we are sorry but we are under strict Government directives and cannot issue you an exemption. We do feel for you however, and have organised a care package to be sent to your home which should assist you in case these pandemic lockdowns are extended,” replied Mr Mac in an email.

Two days later, a neatly wrapped package arrived at Honey’s home. It contained a box of condoms.

Elias Pivep

Failed stand-up comic who now gets his kicks from Simpsons business memes.

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