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Hospital janitor relieved to learn ‘Code Brown’ is not what he thought it was

As the words ‘Code Brown’ blasted across Victoria in response to rising pressure in the public health system, janitor Hugh Honey braced to head home sick under the assumption it was going to be a few sticky days at work. 

That was until word quickly spread through the janitorial department that Code Brown was in fact, not in reference to an abundance of the colour the code is named after. 

“When I heard ‘Code Brown’ blare over the hospital PA system, my heart sank,” said Honey. 

“We get Code Red all the time and that’s normally in response to an emergency such as a situation with blood everywhere so I assumed Code Brown was named in a similar vein.”

Fortunately for Honey, the Code Brown in Victoria was in reference to demand in the public health system. With the Code Brown declared, it means that healthcare professionals from the private sector can be called in to assist in the overcrowded public health system in response to hospitals being crowded by COVID patients. 

Upon return to the tea room at the end of his shift, Honey had a note on his locker informing him that he had been called up to perform open heart surgery given his experience clearing blockages.

Elias Pivep

Failed stand-up comic who now gets his kicks from Simpsons business memes.

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