Category Specific RSS

Categories: Satire

Old mate leaves work early on Friday again, to get COVID test ‘just in case’

Sparing no expense to ensure he does not bring COVID into his office, Hugh Honey has committed to taking a COVID test each week on a Friday afternoon, for which he will respectfully leave work early. 

The graceful decision by Honey has been made each week at midday on Friday afternoon with Honey insisting it is the least disruptive way to make sure he doesn’t get anyone else in the office sick. 

“I haven’t been showing any symptoms but you can never be too safe in this current environment,” said Honey. 

“Just in case I caught the virus coming into work, the best thing for me to do is to go and get tested so that I don’t spread it around the office. 

“If it means I have to leave early on a Friday afternoon, so be it. I would just be dirty on myself if I passed it on to someone else so I’ll get my test, isolate myself at home over the weekend and be fresh as a daisy by Monday.”

Honey is triple vaccinated and works Monday to Thursday from home.

Elias Pivep

Failed stand-up comic who now gets his kicks from Simpsons business memes.

Recent Posts

Semtech and EMASS Bring Intelligence to the Edge as AI Meets Long-Range IoT

Australia’s industrial and IoT sectors are racing toward smarter, more autonomous sensing and one of…

1 month ago

Control Bionics Moves to Fully Acquire NeuroBounce Program as EMG-Based Performance Tech Gains Momentum

As interest in neuromuscular activation tools accelerates across elite sport, Control Bionics Limited (ASX:CBL) is…

1 month ago

SKS Technologies Moves to Expand NSW Footprint With Delta Elcom Acquisition

Australia’s data-centre construction sector continues to surge on the back of cloud adoption, AI-driven computing…

2 months ago

Monash University Partners with HITIQ to Advance Concussion Science Using Smart Mouthguards

A major Australian research initiative is set to push forward global understanding of brain injury,…

2 months ago

Harris Technology targets return to profitability amid surging Refurbished Tech sales and Apple expansion

Following a successful FY25 which saw a boost in gross profit after launching its refurbished…

3 months ago

Pivotal Metals Secures $5.4M to Fast-Track Quebec Drill Program

Pivotal Metals (ASX:PVT) has locked in $5.4 million in fresh funding to accelerate exploration across…

3 months ago