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Woman subjected to 6-hour cricket education after asking ‘Who’s winning’ on Day 1

  • In Satire
  • December 8, 2021
  • Elias Pivep
Woman subjected to 6-hour cricket education after asking ‘Who’s winning’ on Day 1

In her attempts to meander into workplace culture, accounting graduate Martina Martinez has been given a comprehensive education on the inner workings of Test cricket after walking into the office tea room and asking her colleagues, “Who’s winning?”. 

With her quaint smile of ignorance, Martinez was surprised by the response with her question met with facial expressions of disdain as the elder statesmen in the room shook their heads in disappointment. 

Understanding the importance of workplace inclusion, Sales Manager Hugh Honey promptly stepped up to crease, offering Martinez an explanation as to why others in the room appeared dismissive, despite her good intentions. 

“Hi Martina, we understand you are new to the office but it is important that you understand the question you just asked before I answer it,” said Honey. 

“You see, it all dates back to 1877 when Australia first played England at the MCG.” 

Honey then proceeded to explain the finite details of the 5-day game that had just commenced, detailing the rivalry, the pitch conditions, the line ups, the form of both teams and a very diplomatic explanation as to why Pat Cummins was recently elevated to the highest office in Australian sport. 

Seeking acceptance from her male colleagues in the office who had taken extended lunch breaks, Martinez continued to nod and smile politely as Honey did his best to explain the LBW rule, a process that alone took 30 minutes with diagrams drawn in high detail. 

6 hours later, Honey had explained why no team was winning yet. 

Upon declaration of Stumps on Day 1, Martinez filed out of the tea room in an orderly manner vowing never to express interest in cricket ever again. 

Honey missed his sales targets and was reprimanded by HR. 

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Elias Pivep
Failed stand-up comic who now gets his kicks from Simpsons business memes.
Latest posts by Elias Pivep (see all)
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  • Annoying coworker goes quiet after ATAR results reveal their son is an idiot - December 15, 2022
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  • About
  • Latest Posts
Elias Pivep
Failed stand-up comic who now gets his kicks from Simpsons business memes.
Latest posts by Elias Pivep (see all)
  • Family shocked at how much money they saved by not buying useless Christmas presents - January 2, 2023
  • Annoying coworker goes quiet after ATAR results reveal their son is an idiot - December 15, 2022
  • World Cup fan too tired to get kids ready for school - December 8, 2022

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  • About
  • Latest Posts
Elias Pivep
Failed stand-up comic who now gets his kicks from Simpsons business memes.
Latest posts by Elias Pivep (see all)
  • Family shocked at how much money they saved by not buying useless Christmas presents - January 2, 2023
  • Annoying coworker goes quiet after ATAR results reveal their son is an idiot - December 15, 2022
  • World Cup fan too tired to get kids ready for school - December 8, 2022
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