Login | Register
Profile | Log out
logo

  • Home
  • News
  • Opinion
  • Other
    • Market Updates
    • Explainers
    • Satire
  • About
  • Contact Us
    • Contact
    • Get Covered
    • Posting Guidelines
  • Subscribe
Submit An Article

Latest Articles

  • Nanoveu Secures $2 Million to Fast-Track Commercial Launch of ECS-DoT Chip and AIoT Platform
    Nanoveu Secures $2 Million to Fast-Track Commercial Launch of ECS-DoT Chip and AIoT Platform
    • News

  • Archer Unlocks Cryogenic Sensor Breakthrough for Quantum Computing
    Archer Unlocks Cryogenic Sensor Breakthrough for Quantum Computing
    • News

  • EGL Secures $1.9M PFAS Plant Contract as Demand for Clean-Up Technologies Surges
    EGL Secures $1.9M PFAS Plant Contract as Demand for Clean-Up Technologies Surges
    • News

  • RocketDNA Secures Major Aerial Tech Contract with Vault Minerals at WA Gold Site
    RocketDNA Secures Major Aerial Tech Contract with Vault Minerals at WA Gold Site
    • News

  • BirdDog Boosts Buy-Back Offer by 40% Ahead of ASX Delisting Vote
    BirdDog Boosts Buy-Back Offer by 40% Ahead of ASX Delisting Vote
    • News

  • AML3D Launches High-Tech U.S. Facility to Power Submarine Supply Chain
    AML3D Launches High-Tech U.S. Facility to Power Submarine Supply Chain
    • News

  • Vection Enters $520K Agritech Deal to Build AI-Powered Farming Robot
    Vection Enters $520K Agritech Deal to Build AI-Powered Farming Robot
    • News

  • Unith Achieves Strong Growth in Platform Usage and Strategic Partnerships
    Unith Achieves Strong Growth in Platform Usage and Strategic Partnerships
    • News

  • FBR and Samsung Heavy Industries Execute Engineering Service Agreement for Shipbuilding Automation Project
    FBR and Samsung Heavy Industries Execute Engineering Service Agreement for Shipbuilding Automation Project
    • News

  • Bioxyne Lifts FY2025 Revenue Forecast as Psychedelics and Pharma Push Gains Pace
    Bioxyne Lifts FY2025 Revenue Forecast as Psychedelics and Pharma Push Gains Pace
    • News

‘This is not a sports bar!” Manager gunning for promotion shuts off Olympics coverage

  • In Satire
  • July 28, 2021
  • Elias Pivep
‘This is not a sports bar!” Manager gunning for promotion shuts off Olympics coverage

With Australians glued to coverage of the Tokyo 2020 Olympics which are conveniently timed for gold medal swimming events held around lunchtime each day, the mighty victories of our swim team have united a nation. But not all have been as impressed by our efforts in the pool with one certain manager disappointed that their team is being distracted by the Olympic Games. 

Marketing coordinator Martina Martinez is one who has been forced to live stream Australia’s heroic performances on her laptop after her manager shut off the office televisions, declaring to the whole floor, “This is not a sports bar!” 

“Mr Neslon has been gunning for a promotion for the past few years and he probably thinks this highlights his commitment to productivity but it just comes off as un-Australian,” said Martinez. 

“He doesn’t really understand swimming, or sports in general, so this is his way of promoting an inclusive culture. 

“Fortunately for us, he’s about as tech-savvy as a peanut so we’re all just live streaming on our computers.” 

As the entire office erupted in cheers when Cate Campbell anchored the Australian 4 x 100m freestyle team to claim Gold, Mr Neslon was glad to see everyone so excited about the sale he believed he had just secured. 

  • About
  • Latest Posts
Elias Pivep
Failed stand-up comic who now gets his kicks from Simpsons business memes.
Latest posts by Elias Pivep (see all)
  • Family shocked at how much money they saved by not buying useless Christmas presents - January 2, 2023
  • Annoying coworker goes quiet after ATAR results reveal their son is an idiot - December 15, 2022
  • World Cup fan too tired to get kids ready for school - December 8, 2022
  •  
  •  
  •  
  •  
  • Satire

Leave a Comment

You must be logged in to post a comment.

  • About
  • Latest Posts
Elias Pivep
Failed stand-up comic who now gets his kicks from Simpsons business memes.
Latest posts by Elias Pivep (see all)
  • Family shocked at how much money they saved by not buying useless Christmas presents - January 2, 2023
  • Annoying coworker goes quiet after ATAR results reveal their son is an idiot - December 15, 2022
  • World Cup fan too tired to get kids ready for school - December 8, 2022

Login or register for free to access unlimited reading

Register Now!
  • About
  • Latest Posts
Elias Pivep
Failed stand-up comic who now gets his kicks from Simpsons business memes.
Latest posts by Elias Pivep (see all)
  • Family shocked at how much money they saved by not buying useless Christmas presents - January 2, 2023
  • Annoying coworker goes quiet after ATAR results reveal their son is an idiot - December 15, 2022
  • World Cup fan too tired to get kids ready for school - December 8, 2022
  • News

  • Opinion

  • Satire

  • About

  • Contact Us

  • Subscribe

The content published on this website is solely for general information purposes and is not to be construed as financial advice. Should you seek financial advice you should consult with an appropriately qualified person. Opinions expressed on this site are subject to change without notice and The Sentiment who produced this content is under no obligation to keep the information current. The Sentiment, affiliated companies & associates may have a conflict of interest with companies discussed on the website due to commercial arrangements, for example they may be shareholders in the company, be engaged by them to assist in investor communications or receive commission/brokerage for funds raised.

Copyright © 2020 The Sentiment. All rights reserved.
Subscribe

Enter your email address below to subscribe to The Sentiment’s weekly newsletter, highlighting the top news, research, opinion and satire articles shaping ASX investor sentiment.

The Sentiment respects your privacy and will not spam you. View our privacy policy here.