Category Specific RSS

Satire

Group chat mate schemes to ‘crash the ASX’ after reading one GameStop article

After understanding the collective power of the internet, minnow investor Vic Vinegar is preparing to bathe in bathtubs of ‘pineapples’ through his plan to replicate the GameStop rally in Australia, with a scheme he has concocted through the “Lads” group chat. 

“holy sh*t, did youse guyz sees da rally on game stp???” posted Vinegar. 

“We shld do te same here and short squeeze a stoke lk Z1P. We gon be sooooooo rich whn da price moooooons. All you gys got 2 do is take out all yr savings on Monday and load up on APT stock, I’ll do a pst on rEddit nd we gon be sooooooooooo rich 🚀🚀🚀” 

When queried as to why he wanted to target Zip co (ASX: Z1P) or how much stock his group needed to buy, he remained non-committal. 

“Mate. Shut up. Buy the stock. Pineapples. Bro down,” he posted as a recorded voice message in response to a barrage of questions from others trying to understand the plan in more detail. 

‘Pineapple’ is a colloquial term in Australian slang for $50 notes.

Elias Pivep

Failed stand-up comic who now gets his kicks from Simpsons business memes.

Recent Posts

AML3D announces stronger FY26, with positive EBITDA reported in the second half

Adelaide-based metal printing group books record $12.5 million revenue and a record $78 million sales…

3 days ago

Refurbished tech gives Harris Technology a second life

Harris Technology has found a higher-margin growth engine in an unlikely place: the market for…

4 days ago

Imagion Biosystems Advances MagSense® Phase 2 Trial

Imagion Biosystems (ASX: IBX) is moving its MagSense® HER2 Imaging Agent Phase 1b/2 clinical trial…

1 week ago

Acrux-developed Menopause Hormone Therapy to enter Australian market

Acrux (ASX:ACR) is set to bring its transdermal Estradiol spray Lenzetto® to the Australian market…

3 months ago

Evion Expands Critical Minerals Push with Nevada Fluorspar Option

The race to secure Western-aligned critical minerals supply chains is accelerating as governments and industry…

4 months ago

Green360 Secures Holcim as First Commercial Eco-Clay Customer in Major Validation Milestone

Green360 Technologies (ASX:GT3) has taken a major step forward in the commercialisation of its low-carbon…

4 months ago