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Satire

Not enough diversity, calls for an asexual rainbow Wiggle to be added to group

While some community groups have praised The Wiggles for replacing a white Australian actress with one of colour, others insist not is being done enough to educate children about sexual diversity from a young age. 

Martina Martinez (they/them), a member of Sydney’s LGBTQ community, was disappointed that an asexual Rainbow Wiggle was not added to the musical group to represent children that do not want to align with the gender or sexuality assumed to them at birth. 

“Just because a child was born a boy, it doesn’t mean we should be raising them as one,” said Martinez. 

“The fact most children can’t even speak when they are first introduced to The Wiggles means we should be using the group to educate them on their choices so that they can make informed decisions about their gender, sexuality, pronouns and identity once they can talk.

“Parents around the world should be ashamed of themselves for raising their children as per the gender assigned to them at birth without the child’s consent.” 

The outcry from Martinez and those in her community came amid the appointment of Ethiopian-born Tsehay Hawkins as the Yellow Wiggle. Hawkins replaces Australian-born Emma Watkins who departed the musical quintet to selfishly pursue a PhD, deemed a cardinal sin by the musical group that insist the only way to enjoy life is through consumption of hot potatoes and fruit salad delivered by Uber Eats. 

Shares in Uber Technologies (NYSE: UBER) remain unfazed by the personnel change to their marketing talent. 

Elias Pivep

Failed stand-up comic who now gets his kicks from Simpsons business memes.

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