Category Specific RSS

Satire

Old mate leaves work early on Friday again, to get COVID test ‘just in case’

Sparing no expense to ensure he does not bring COVID into his office, Hugh Honey has committed to taking a COVID test each week on a Friday afternoon, for which he will respectfully leave work early. 

The graceful decision by Honey has been made each week at midday on Friday afternoon with Honey insisting it is the least disruptive way to make sure he doesn’t get anyone else in the office sick. 

“I haven’t been showing any symptoms but you can never be too safe in this current environment,” said Honey. 

“Just in case I caught the virus coming into work, the best thing for me to do is to go and get tested so that I don’t spread it around the office. 

“If it means I have to leave early on a Friday afternoon, so be it. I would just be dirty on myself if I passed it on to someone else so I’ll get my test, isolate myself at home over the weekend and be fresh as a daisy by Monday.”

Honey is triple vaccinated and works Monday to Thursday from home.

Elias Pivep

Failed stand-up comic who now gets his kicks from Simpsons business memes.

Recent Posts

AML3D announces stronger FY26, with positive EBITDA reported in the second half

Adelaide-based metal printing group books record $12.5 million revenue and a record $78 million sales…

3 days ago

Refurbished tech gives Harris Technology a second life

Harris Technology has found a higher-margin growth engine in an unlikely place: the market for…

4 days ago

Imagion Biosystems Advances MagSense® Phase 2 Trial

Imagion Biosystems (ASX: IBX) is moving its MagSense® HER2 Imaging Agent Phase 1b/2 clinical trial…

1 week ago

Acrux-developed Menopause Hormone Therapy to enter Australian market

Acrux (ASX:ACR) is set to bring its transdermal Estradiol spray Lenzetto® to the Australian market…

3 months ago

Evion Expands Critical Minerals Push with Nevada Fluorspar Option

The race to secure Western-aligned critical minerals supply chains is accelerating as governments and industry…

4 months ago

Green360 Secures Holcim as First Commercial Eco-Clay Customer in Major Validation Milestone

Green360 Technologies (ASX:GT3) has taken a major step forward in the commercialisation of its low-carbon…

4 months ago