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AFL umpires to call play on as long as Jack Ginnivan’s head remains attached to body

  • In Satire
  • July 28, 2022
  • Elias Pivep
AFL umpires to call play on as long as Jack Ginnivan’s head remains attached to body

AFL players around the country have been undertaking special training drills this week to ensure they do not behead players while tackling, following changes in the game instigated by Collingwood forward Jack Ginnivan. 

As the controversy that has engulfed the league after Ginnivan’s penchant for drawing high tackles drew the ire of the league, questions were raised as to what it would take for Ginnivan to actually get paid a free kick after a headlock tackle went ignored against Essendon on the weekend. 

Collingwood supporters were quick to answer the question that nobody asked them. 

“He could swap places with Brent Staker and the umpire would have called play on,” said 32-year Collingwood member Edward Mcloud in reference to the famous Barry Hall incident. 

An AFL representative later confirmed that play would be stopped in the event Ginnivan was beheaded in a tackle. Rival defenders have spent the week tackling accordingly.

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Elias Pivep
Failed stand-up comic who now gets his kicks from Simpsons business memes.
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  • About
  • Latest Posts
Elias Pivep
Failed stand-up comic who now gets his kicks from Simpsons business memes.
Latest posts by Elias Pivep (see all)
  • Family shocked at how much money they saved by not buying useless Christmas presents - January 2, 2023
  • Annoying coworker goes quiet after ATAR results reveal their son is an idiot - December 15, 2022
  • World Cup fan too tired to get kids ready for school - December 8, 2022

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  • About
  • Latest Posts
Elias Pivep
Failed stand-up comic who now gets his kicks from Simpsons business memes.
Latest posts by Elias Pivep (see all)
  • Family shocked at how much money they saved by not buying useless Christmas presents - January 2, 2023
  • Annoying coworker goes quiet after ATAR results reveal their son is an idiot - December 15, 2022
  • World Cup fan too tired to get kids ready for school - December 8, 2022
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