Financial difficulties created by Stage 4 lockdowns have tightened the budgets of most Victorian families but thankfully, the State’s economy is well stocked up on thoughts and prayers.
There has been an outpouring of “thoughts and prayers” from Australian politicians being sent to the State but as the Victorian economy notes, it’s very difficult to feed your family on thoughts and prayers.
So bountiful is the Victorian economy’s stockpile of thoughts and prayers, the State is seeking to trade individual thoughts and prayers to their neighbours for actual money or something that can feed their families.
“We’re in the most dire economic situation since World War II but it’s great to see so many politicians open up their wallets and send us thoughts and prayers,” said the Victorian economy.
“Hard working families are cooped up at home with only one family member allowed to leave the house for one hour a day, but that’s ok because thoughts are keeping them employed and prayers are keeping them well fed.”
Upon request to trade thoughts and prayers for something more useful, the New South Wales economy kindly offered some qualified security guards that had passed Security Unit 1 – ‘People Not to Have Sex With While at Work’.
Failed stand-up comic who now gets his kicks from Simpsons business memes.
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